Where there's a Willesden there's a way

Sunday, December 14, 2003

...and I found him too

For days the words "Secret Santa" have been whispered around the office, like the motto of some underground cult. All the teams have arranged to do one, and if you listen carefully you can hear people furtively betraying their secret.

Of course, in my team I know who everyone got, and not least because for half the team I fixed it. People have also been confiding their secret in me, in the hope I'll suggest something appropriate. Others, realising this would happen, have been dropping hints to me.

I drew mine at random, and ended up with Nemo. You'd think with a name like that she'd be easy to buy for, so I left it until the last minute- tomorrow Santa is coming to the office. Which is how I ended up asking this question
"Don't laugh, but I'm looking for Nemo"

I have many problems with this present; not least that giving money to Disney is for me like contributing to the BNP. And also, much as a Nemo soft toy would look quite cute, I can't quite shake the admittedly delusional feeling that Nemo's a fish, and so should really be kept in water. And also, it's impossible to find for a fiver a Nemo toy that isn't just an orange beanbag with stripes.

So after looking everywhere for Nemo, I eventually said sod it and overspend on a cute set of bath toys, turtle and fish, apparently all from the film. OK, so it's plastic tat, and I'm very against buying plastic tat because it's Christmas, but I know Nemo (the colleague) will love it, and it was either that or bath salts. But this doesn't bode well for secret santa- if I, the poorest member of the team with the most free time managed to overspend, I suspect everyone else did too. And also, I think (someone please check this) statistically you could expect that one person should draw their own name, but no-one came to me having done this. So somebody's cheating.

Of course, if I was really into fixing it, I'd draw it so that one of the rich managers got me. But I'm not that dishonest- and I only just thought of that.


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