In my world...

I had to take today off work to give my eyes a bit of a chance to go back to normal. I'd love to know the difference between cross-eyed and boss-eyed, but I think I've finally readjusted now. Little scary though.

So I've been writing Christmas songs again. To the tune of Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer. Take it away!

Simon the boxing day arsonist
Really f'ing hated Christmas
At seven he torched his front room
Saying "Daddy can't drink now"

All of the kids in the care home
Used to leave him well alone
They said "It's the quiet ones
You've gotta watch for"

Then one rainy boxing day
Simon said "f'k it all"
He burnt down the Disney Store
Chanting "Minnie is a whore"

Oh how the people hated him
Papers roasted him alive
Simon the boxing day arsonist
You'll get out in three to five